To Single Parents: Date When You’re Ready, Not When You’re Lonely

Melanie Kane
3 min readNov 8, 2022


Being a single parent is not easy. You know that all too well. You have to take on all responsibilities as a mother and father to your child while also keeping up with the bills and managing the household.

There is a lot of stress and pressure to deal with, and you can’t back out from all of it. You can’t run away because you’re tired. As a result, you feel overwhelmed, helpless, and lonely.

You need a breather.

You long to be excited, happy, and loved once more. It’s not that you don’t feel that from your children, but you want to feel a different kind of love — something that only a romantic partner can provide.

Simply put, you want to re-enter the dating scene.

But, before doing so, you must ensure that the mistakes of your past won’t happen again. This time, you should have a second love that lasts.

So, what are the things you should avoid when dating as a single parent?

Don’t date if you’re not yet healed.

Or else, you’ll just repeat your past. You don’t want to go through it all again, do you? The heartbreak, traumas, and negative emotions are not worth it. You need to be in a healthy state of mind before finding love.

I understand your desire to escape from your past, but using someone as a rebound is not the solution. Think about your kids. They don’t deserve it. Likewise, you. You don’t deserve half-baked love. You deserve genuine love. Love yourself first — heal and become better.

Don’t pretend to be someone you’re not.

People may not want to date you because of your children since not everyone is accepting of single parents. But no matter how hard it may be to date with your circumstance, never resort to lying.

Do not hide the fact that you have children just to land dates. What happens when they find out? They leave, and you’re back to square one? It’s best if you’re honest from the very beginning so that you’ll save time and find someone who genuinely wants to be in your life.

Don’t date just to have a complete family.

It is everyone’s dream to have a complete family. But, don’t date and try so hard to put someone into your kids’ life just for the sake of it.

Having a complete family doesn’t guarantee that you will be happy. If you start dating another person without judging if they’re good for you and your kids, you may end up broken again.

Worse comes to worst, you may also traumatize your children. Do you think love would be worth it if you hurt others in the process? Think it through. Never rush.

Date when you’re ready.

The single-parent life may be exhausting, but don’t let it be the reason you want to date again. That’s not fair for the person you’re dating or you. Only date when you’re physically, mentally, and emotionally ready. This way, you’ll have a better chance of experiencing lasting love.



Melanie Kane

I’m passionate about helping people find deep, emotional connections through